


There Is No Peace

by Robron101



Category: Emmerdale
Genre: Angst, Codependency, Crying Aaron, Explicit Language, Heartache, M/M, Pain, crying Robert, mention of rape
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-04-02
Updated: 2016-04-02
Packaged: 2018-05-30 17:50:13
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,240
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6434356
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Robron101/pseuds/Robron101
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Set right at the end of yesterday's episode. (04/01/2016). I felt like Robert had a lot more to say than just, "Well thanks for caring, mate."</p><p>Robert turns around to give Aaron a piece of his mind, but it doesn't end up working out that way.</p>
            </blockquote>





	There Is No Peace

**Author's Note:**

> I feel like Emmerdale leaves a lot unsaid, so here is the continuation of what I think should have happened.
> 
> Also hit me up on tumblr, http://geena-rae.tumblr.com/

“Well, thanks for caring, mate.” 

Robert stormed out. Anger and hurt being the only things he could feel. How could Aaron turn on him? Didn't he understand everything he's been doing is for him? How could he not see that? Robert wanted to make him see, make him hear how worried he was, not just for himself but for Aaron as well. 

He squared his shoulders, turned back around and marched back into the room to confront Aaron. His back was turned to him, but Robert found that easier to say all the things he needed to say. “First off, what I did, I did it for you. Yeah it was stupid. No, I didn't think at the time it could backfire because all I thought about was helping you. Everything I do, is for you. I know Liv is your sister and your more inclined to trust her, but I don't. I don't trust anyone when it comes to you. All I want for you is to get justice, to have some kind of peace with this.” 

“PEACE?” Aaron shouted and turned around. His face red, tears pouring down his face. “THERE IS NO PEACE FOR ME!” 

“Aaron there will be. Once the jury find Gordon guilty,” Aaron scoffed and cut Robert off. 

“No. Even if they find him guilty, and that's a very big if, I will never be at peace.” The tears flowed more freely. “This should have been over a long time ago. I WANTED IT TO END! IT WOULD OF, IF YOU HADN'T PAID THAT KID IN THE FIRST PLACE!” 

“I just wanted to help. I couldn't stand seeing you so miserable.” 

“Right. Everything has to be about Robert flippin' Sugden?” He turned his back on Robert. Trying to stop the tears that kept coming. 

“It's not about me, Aaron. It's about what I want for you. It's about you.” Robert moved closer to Aaron, wanting to rest his hand on his shoulder, but too afraid to make that move. “I want you to find peace.” 

“I never will,” Aaron whispered. 

“Yes,” he made the mistake of touching Aaron. It set him off, he turned around and shoved Robert away from. 

“YOU DON'T GET IT! THAT LITTLE BOY,” he pointed with his hand as if the age eight Aaron was standing in the corner watching all of this. “HE'S ME. I'M HIM.” Aaron slammed his hand against his chest to get his point across. “WE'RE THE SAME PERSON. I WILL HAVE ALWAYS BEEN RAPED, ROBERT!” 

Aaron's hands went over his face, and the sound that came from him broke Robert's heart into a million pieces. It was the worst cry of pain he'd ever heard. Worse than when Andy cried over Katie's broken body, worse than the pain Robert had suffered when his Mum had died. It went on and on, like Aaron's soul was being ripped apart. 

Aaron swayed forward, Robert caught him in his arms and took both of them to the floor. Aaron's head collapsed into Robert's lap, and he folded himself around Aaron, his head resting on the younger mans back. His crying continued, his whole body shaking with it. Robert fought back his own tears, wanting to be strong for Aaron. “Oh god,” Aaron cried, his words muffled against his hands. “I'm always going to be like this.” 

It was a while before Aaron calmed down, his breathing was still erratic, but the tears had stopped. Robert sat up just as Aaron uncovered his face, his head still resting on Robert's lap. Robert ran his hands through Aaron's hair, hoping it would soothe him. 

“When I look at you,” Robert began, being very careful with his words, “I see . . . the man who came into my life, and took me by complete surprise. I see the man who makes me want to be a better man. I see a man that I wish I was. You're strong, resilient, a true fighter.” Aaron looked up at him. “I don't see that little boy. Neither does your Mum or Paddy, Adam, or Cain. We see only you.” 

“I don't see what you see,” Aaron whispered. “I feel like I'm that scared eight year old boy, waiting every night for his Dad to . . .” 

“You're not him,” Robert said. “As long as I am breathing, Gordon will never touch you like that again.” 

I'll kill him first, Robert thought. 

“I don't know what I'm going to do if I lose this trial,” Aaron whispered. “ I don't . . . I don't think I can go on.” 

Rob put his hand under Aaron's chin, forcing Aaron to look him in the eyes. “You will survive. You are stronger than him. He's nothing but a sick, sadistic man who will pay for what he's done. . . . One way or another.” 

Aaron didn't comment, but his words made him feel better. He didn't want to think of Robert hurting anyone else, but he also didn't want to be scared. He felt protected with him.

“Will you stay with me?” Aaron asked. 

“As long as you want me,” Robert answered. 

They stared at each other for a long time. Neither wanting to break the spell of their gazes. Robert's phone went off. He pulled it out of his pocket, only breaking eye contact to look at the text message. 

“It's Vic,” he sighed. “She needs to see me.” 

“Go,” Aaron said. 

“Are you sure?” 

“Yeah. I'll be fine,” Aaron lied. He didn't want to keep Robert from his life. 

“Call me if you need me, anytime.” He got off the floor, pulling Aaron up with him. 

“Sure,” Aaron said with a fake smile. 

Robert reached over and caressed Aaron's stubbly cheek. “You're not alone.” 

“Okay,” it was a mere whisper, but Robert heard him. 

He turned to leave, but Aaron's words stopped him from going. “I didn't pick Liv over you.” 

“What?” 

“I didn't pick her over you. It's . . . that . . . I don't want her to know. I don't want her to hear what I went through. I'd rather keep her in the dark. I'll do anything to protect her from that. She shouldn't have to live with my pain.” 

“I understand,” Robert said. He'd protect Aaron from all of the horrible things that have happened if he could, but it was too late for that. “I'll call you later, yeah?” 

“Sure,” Robert hugged Aaron. He never wanted to let go, to keep him safe in his arms forever and ever. He was his everything and to let go of Aaron, it was like Robert lost a part of himself. 

“Goodbye,” Robert said with one last longing look at Aaron. 

Once Robert was in his car did he really let go. He cried, tears pouring from his eyes, his chest heaving with sobs. He slammed his hand against the wheel over and over, screaming curses all the while. 

“FUCK,” he screamed one last time before resting his head against the steering wheel. “You idiot,” he sobbed to himself. He'd never felt so stupid in his life. He had once again tried to make this about him, but it wasn't. It was about Aaron. What he wanted and needed wasn't important, but what Aaron needed was. He had to stop thinking of himself for once. 

“From now on you will be there for him, completely. No matter of the consequences,” he told himself. He started his car and drove away, feeling more useless than ever.


End file.
